For most happy couples, their wedding day is a euphoric blur of rings, toasts, speeches and dancing before crumpling in an exhausted heap on a hotel bed.

But for the photographers capturing the occasion –  those big group shots for mum’s mantlepiece or candid snaps of people drinking and dancing – it can be a VERY different story.

Last week more than 900 snappers signed an online petition calling for the conditions for wedding photographers and videographers in churches to be improved.

They accused clergymen and women of making it near-impossible to get pictures of couples on their special day because of their ‘rude, humiliating, aggressive and abusive behaviour’.

But now wedding photographers have lifted the lid further, telling MailOnline the other niggly annoyances they have to deal with from grabby drunk guests to being told to avoid picturing nuisance relatives. 

And according to the snappers there is always one pesky guest and more often than not it’s the sister of the bride or groom that is most feared, rather than the mother-in-law. 

The rumble from wedding photographers came as an old video resurfaced on TikTok of a priest halting proceedings and refusing to carry on until the snapper put their camera away. 

The petition was set up by Rachel Roberts, a Lincolnshire based photographer, who feared that many church leaders were ‘stuck in the past’ while those who have embraced social media were left with long wedding waiting lists.

‘Ultimately, we all want the same thing which is to deliver lovely results for the couple,’ she told the Mail. 

‘We live in a digital age now and couples do want loads of coverage of their gorgeous ceremonies and we can work with priests and vicars to do this without being intrusive.’

Johnny MP, 41, who has been a wedding photographer for 13 years and worked at over 400 weddings, said tensions between the clergy is ‘definitely’ something he’s experienced.

Throughout his career, vicars have told him that no photographs are allowed as the church is ‘a private room between the couple and God’ while another, upon introduction, shoved her hand in his face listing off her ‘three rules’. 

The multi-award winning photographer of the year said: ‘It’s really strange because I’ve done weddings for every major faith in the world – Hindu, Muslim, Sikh, Jewish, Humanist, all variants of Christianity – and none of those people have ever had a problem. It always seems to be Church of England vicars.

‘Most are fine, you need to show respect as they are in charge and I’ve had some really lovely ones, but a handful have called me out during the ceremony. 

‘On one occasion I had already spoken to the vicar about where to stand but he called me out during the vows. It creates a really bad atmosphere and [the couple] probably felt a bit awkward.

‘The couple and guests took it well and just joked about it afterwards saying you’re on the naughty step but I was really embarrassed, because I am there to work and serve the couple – the same way the church makes money for doing weddings. We are all just trying to do our job.’

One female videographer, who wished to stay anonymous, said: ‘I’ve encountered a mix of experiences with clergymen while filming weddings.

‘Some have been very accommodating, allowing me to be up front and central to capture the important moments, whilst I others have made it challenging, one specifically where I was tapped on the shoulder mid ceremony and quite rudely asked to stop filming, despite being hired to do so by the couple, which i found incredibly embarrassing and disruptive to the service.

‘It seems to be a luck of the draw, with both positive and frustrating encounters, but I do think certain people like to be bossy and be in control of everything.’

Tom Dinghy, who was the photographer at Jeremy Kyle’s wedding in 2021, has also been put in some tricky situations trying to balance the couple’s wants with a stubborn clergyman or woman.

He said: ‘Those who work in churches seem to have this fear of being distracted while weddings are taking place.

‘It is the photographer’s job to capture everything and everyone without being the centre of attention – I’ve never met a photographer who wants to be looked at while they’re working.

‘We want to get all the angles and everyone’s faces which can mean being behind the vicar. This can be a point of contention because they don’t like it if you stand behind them and feel like we are invading their work space, but we are all here to do the job. It is an odd thing.’

Last week Dr Rowan Williams, who officiated the Prince and Princess of Wales’ wedding in 2011, admitted that some vicars can be ‘a complete pain’ when it comes to wedding photographers in churches. 

‘While some vicars can be a complete pain and over-controlling to a degree, clergy too need to be able to do their jobs,’ he told The Times. 

‘A request not to be intrusive during a service when something significant is supposed to be taking place at the spiritual level is not unreasonable.’

Outside of the church, there are other minor issues that photographers have to battle with through the day from drunken guests grabbing their clothes to family members wanting their own ‘mini photoshoot’. 

Mr Dinghy, who was an events photographer for eleven years before specialising in proposals and weddings, said: ‘Normally, the couple is absolutely lovely. 

‘There’s always one guest who thinks they know a great angle or tells you where they think you should go. They think they are being funny or are hobbyist photographers. But we treat them with politeness.

‘In my experience there is always a sister of the bride or sister of the groom that has something to say, while the mother of the bride is usually lovely.’

At one wedding he attended the 37-year-old photographer from south east London, managed to get a candid snap of the groom and the best man kicking back with a beer before the ceremony.

‘It was a very casual shot,’ he said. ‘But then the sister of the groom said ‘are you going to take all the family photos here because it’s not a nice backdrop’. I am polite but I am thinking leave me alone.’ 

Another female photographer, also based in London, spoke of the difficulties of navigating through family dynamics on the big day.

The 31-year-old said: ‘Weddings are intense and emotional days so you get a lot of weird things going on. Sometimes you get guests that pull you by your clothes to ask for a photo rather than just speaking to you they’ll grab your shirt.

‘Sometimes you get a family member who forgets it’s not their wedding, so you get pulled aside to have a mini-photoshoot with the sister-in-law. 

‘Especially if they have their own families they want to get shots done because everyone looks great but it’s not about them.

‘You have to reign them back in and tell them it’s not about them – it’s about the bride.’

On other occasions photographers have been told not to picture a certain person in the family or try and cut them out of group shots of the relatives.  

‘It’s awkward because sometimes you get a bride or groom telling you they don’t want pictures of a particular family member which is sometimes unavoidable,’ the unnamed photographer said.

‘Then you need to negotiate with that family member by putting them on the end of the photograph or try and get another family photo when they walk away but you can’t make it obvious.

‘I often get situations where there is a stage or an aisle and people are tapping you to move out the way saying I am blocking them which is hard to negotiate as you have to do your job.’

Some female photographers have also expressed concerns about feeling particularly vulnerable while working at weddings.

The photographer said she had been put in some odd situations during weddings and on one occasion was even offered cocaine by a groomsman.

‘Often, the parties get crazy. When I started out as a female photographer, and guests were drinking, some people would get a little overfamiliar,’ the photographer said.

‘There was a time where I was in the groomsmen’s room to take photographs but all they wanted me to do was party with them and it made things difficult.’

Mr MP added: ‘I’ve had a few drunk people. It doesn’t bother me too much. It’s much harder when people are sober and more conscious of you.’

Mr Dingley, who has photographed more than 600 proposals, added: ‘Guests do ask when drunk ‘let me take a photo of you’ but one, I don’t want you holding my really expensive camera, and two no one wants a picture of me. 

‘I often joke about taking a selfie and there’s always plenty to do so I just go off to another circle. 

‘But I like the guests I meet and I’ll never speak to these people again so I often have a chat with them while working and it’s nice seeing everyone have a good time.’

The photographers, many who say their career is a life-long vocation, stressed that all these small annoyances are just a small part of their day and never have a huge impact.

The photographers agree that when it comes to managing a wedding, and keeping everyone as happy as possible, it all comes down to communication.

Mr MP said: ‘Wedding ceremonies are a big day and you cannot go on and it is a very competitive industry, it’s sink or swim but I love it. The fact that you make people happy seeing couples with their photos and memories that will last forever.’

‘A lot of people think having a professional camera or smartphone will capture everything on a wedding day, but having a professional photographer who is dedicated to take photos is necessary,’ Mr Dinghy added.

‘You can’t rely on a family member or friend with a camera as you want the whole day incorporated.’

Oxford-based wedding photographer Matthew Ellacott, 50, added: ‘People have expectations at weddings. People will ask for their photos to be taken and I’ve had mothers of the bride who have strong opinions of what they would like.

‘I always feel like it is my job to please the couple and strike the tone they would like. Weddings are unpredictable and that’s part of it. 

‘Alcohol is drunk and you get bumped, things get bashed or knocked over, it happens. I’ve been fortunate enough to not meet anyone who’s been too aggressive and people who are very clear in the ideas they want.’

When it comes to church weddings, it is down to the priest or vicar’s discretion on what photographs can be taken at each church and may refuse to allow them during the ceremony at all.

Others only permit one picture during the signing of the registry. The Church of England has said that it worked with professional photographers to produce guidance for couples.

A spokesperson told MailOnline previously: ‘Our clergy welcome couples and work with them to ensure that their wedding is personal, meaningful, spiritual, and beautiful. Photography is an important part of the day for many of the couples who come to church to celebrate their wedding.

‘Good early communication between the couple, the officiant and the photographer can help to ensure that expectations are aligned, and we advise that couples discuss these matters in advance with their church, so they know what to expect.

‘We want to reassure couples that they don’t have to be churchgoers to have a church wedding, they don’t need to be christened, and we welcome couples who already have children. Just ask to find out what’s possible.’